We are almost 7 days past our official due date of March 5th and still waiting. I've had lots of contractions but not really anything else. I didn't expect the last few days to be the hardest part- Cori mentioned that this part of pregnancy is so miserable that it helps combat any remaining fears of the labor, which is so true- I just want to get it started and over! ANYTHING is better than waiting... of course, that is true for other areas of my life as well- I am simply not a patient waiter. Hah. I know she'll come when she's ready, however, I can completely understand how appealing the thought of induction is, even though I will NOT do that! I also underestimated how I would be mentally/ emotionally at this stage. I am grouchy and anxious- NOTHING exists outside of this baby/ pregnancy. Not work, not friends, not even hobbies. The house has been cleaned, and everything gotten ready for the homebirth. I stopped answering my phone days ago after receiving TONS of phone calls and messages that all asked the same thing: How are you feeling? Any baby/ labor yet? And etc. (I've been mentally compiling a list of questions to never ask my pregnant moms and friends, lol). And I know that everyone's excited, but next time Justin and I have decided to give everyone a due date a month after the "real" one to prevent this added stress. We are, however, LOVING our birth tub that we're renting. It is hard-sided (not inflatable) and 6 feet across- huge! Also, it's heated and has jets for jacuzzi power... we're in it almost every night relaxing. It is SO wonderful!! Not looking forward to giving it back! We set it up in Kyra's room because it is bigger than we anticipated so wouldn't fit in our bedroom, and we wanted privacy for the birth, so we didn't want it in the living room.
Also, we've found that with the extra time waiting, dungeons and dragons makes an excellent distraction! I'm learning to DM, and we're playing in another local game as well. Justin is in the process of writing a story, and over-all we're really enjoying it. He joined me in "nesting" the other night- I even caught him scrubbing the FRONT of the oven- it was so sweet! Our house has never been cleaner or looked better!
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Plans
So I know I've waited way too long to update some of this, however, it has been a crazy last few weeks! I'm at 38 and a half weeks of pregnancy, and she could come anytime (we're more than ready for her, hehe). I'll post more about what's been happening around here some other time, but for now (and at the risk of offending everyone) I decided to post the two "plans" that have come together for us. The first is our actual birth plan. We are just so thrilled and privileged to be able to experience this birth at home and have it our way, and with some AWESOME attendants! While there is some personal stuff in it, I feel it's important to think about and a lot of my friends didn't even know some of these were options, so I thought I'd preserve that here. I'm also posting the initial core parenting values that Justin and I have agreed upon and put together. The weeks and months of research that I put into these topics have really helped with some of these difficult decisions, and I'm finding that as I approach the adventure of birth and entering the era in my life of motherhood that my confidence is growing and my fear is lessening- something I'm relieved about! I hope you enjoy!!
Jennifer and Kyra’s Birth Wishes
Birth Attendents:
Justin
Mom (Pam)
Stephanie (sister)
Stacey (Doula)
Cori (Midwife)
Environment: Dimmed lights/ candles, quiet voices, my birth music, aromatherapy
Pain Relief Techniques I want to use:
-Breathing techniques (breath WITH me- don’t TELL me to breath)
-Distraction (taking a walk, eating, sleeping/ resting)
-Relaxation (massage and touch (everywhere except my legs), slow breathing, guided visualization, visual imagery (waves, candle)
-Vocal- singing, moaning
-Aromatherapy
-Temp.- hot shower, birth tub, rice packs, maybe ice?
-Movement- walking, constantly changing positions, standing, rocking, hugging someone and rocking, slow dancing, pelvic tilts/ rocks, rhythmical movements (dancing?), birth ball use
-TOUCH- (light and hard and all these types)
Kissing (Justin, lol), acupressure, firm belly stroking, gentle touch, massage (both light and heavy), stroking, pressure
Ultimately, I want…
-to be able to move as I need to
-to feel uninhibited in the noises I make
-for my door to always be closed
First Stage:- Probably accomplished with most of you not here yet. Justin and I plan to go for sushi in this stage, and to get out and walk a lot (maybe mall). I don’t want to feel like a watched pot. I may want to be completely alone as well. Probably won’t need many, if any, comfort techniques.
Second Stage: Will work through comfort techniques as I need them. Need help staying hydrated (and keeping glucose levels up with light food and/or honey). Will probably want someone with me at all times. NO distractions (cell phones- even vibrate bothers me). Positions for this: squatting, hands and knees, on toilet, standing
Transition: more of above. I like Justin telling me when the contraction is half over, so if you can, wear a watch with a second hand!
Delivery: I plan on Justin and I being in the birth pool for delivery. I want to touch Kyra’s head as she crowns. Justin will catch, or I will. Kyra will immediately be skin-to-skin with me (still quiet and dark in room). Eventually, (10-15 minutes usually) placenta will be delivered. It will be saved for encapsulation the next day, so placed in Tupperware in the ‘fridge. After cord stops pulsing Justin will cut it.
After delivery: Cori (our midwife) will eventually check out Kyra (I think after Kyra is o.k. on my chest she helps us into bed, and Justin and Kyra and I have an hour completely alone to bond and rest). Then Kyra gets weighed (no shots or anything) and checked over. I’ll need to eat something healthy and light and rest.
IF I NEED TRANSPORT:
I would like you to accompany me, should the need arise and you feel comfortable. I will be including a cesarean birth plan just in case, to give the doctor.
Stephanie will be taking pictures of the birth. I’m sure that everyone else will want to spell off for rest, food and such.
I do NOT want to be told to “relax” or “breathe”. I LIKE the words:
Limp, loose, light, cool, floating, soft, calm, free, comfy, cozy, harmony, balance
I’ll be printing out some guided visualization for someone to read to me.
Our Core Parenting Values:
To raise happy and healthy children by making the best choices we can with the current information we’ve found based on research. To develop lasting, positive relationships in our family. To encourage an environment of positive action and choices based on continual learning.
Specific Actions:
-Birth- As naturally as possible. Reducing medication exposure as well as improving familial bonding and connection and experiencing a positive birth experience.
-Breastfeeding- EXCLUSIVELY! We will breastfeed exclusively until solid foods are introduced around 6 months. This will include breastfeeding on cues and demand (not on a schedule, but when baby is hungry). NO FORMULA is to be given at ANY time!! In the event Jennifer cannot breastfeed (i.e.- death) a milkbank will be used. We will also breastfeed until the CHILD is ready to wean- which is usually between 3-4 years.
-Cloth Diapering- To reduce chemical exposure and skin irritations cloth diapers will be used along with cloth wipes. The new systems are easy (and cute) and have a huge impact on budget as well as the environment.
-No/ Limited Vaccinations- At this time we have decided NOT to vaccinate. We may initiate a delayed schedule with certain (limited) vaccines in the future. This includes newborn eyedrops, vit.k and antibiotics.
-Babywearing/ Co-sleeping- We will be practicing several methods of babywearing including the sling and babycarriers. This will be done while out of the house but also at home, so our babies can remain close to us for bonding and intellectual development (among other benefits). To help in this bonding, reduce SIDS and assist with breastfeeding we will also be co-sleeping with our babies sleeping in bed with us or in a bed pushed next to us.
-We want to promote gender-neutral identities in our children. To that end we are o.k. with and encouraging play that specifically mixes gender- i.e.- our girl(s) playing with trucks, cars, etc., and our boy(s) playing house, dress-up, etc. This also applies to colors of clothing. In addition, we want to reduce the “princess” ideology for girls, and the “non-emotional” ideology for boys.
-We don’t believe corporal punishment encourages positive, future relationships or teaches lessons other than fear, lack of trust and avoidance. And if this should change, NO ONE will be allowed to administer corporal punishment to our children except Jennifer and Justin.
-Praise- Praise of effort will be what we strive for in raising our children, as this gives them a controllable action to change. In addition, we want to limit praise based on emotion without controllable qualities. For example- We will praise: effort and hard work in cleaning rooms, dressing nicely, working on a paper or subject, etc. We will LIMIT praise such as “You’re so smart, you’re so pretty” which are NOT effort-based but inherent qualities.
-We believe that if a child is old enough to ask certain questions, then they should get an (age-appropriate) answer. So if a child asks why the sky is blue, or WHY certain things happen then they should get an answer they can understand.
-Healthy Food- Healthy food contributes to healthy brain and motor development. We will limit junk foods in our house, provide healthy snacks (focusing on protein, fruits, veggies, nuts and cheeses among others) and have NO fast food or soda in our house or while out.
-We believe vocabulary is a powerful and educational part of learning. We will not limit our children’s use of vocabulary (i.e.- “cuss” words) although we will explain appropriate use of “adult” words and when they can be used (at home).
-We believe that children are very impressionable, especially in the formative first 10 years. To that extent we will be introducing them to the non-mystical belief system that we adhere to and we will severely limit their exposure to anyone discussing or practicing religion around them. (ex- not being exposed to dinner prayers, “god bless’s”, and other mystical practices within reason).
Jennifer and Kyra’s Birth Wishes
Birth Attendents:
Justin
Mom (Pam)
Stephanie (sister)
Stacey (Doula)
Cori (Midwife)
Environment: Dimmed lights/ candles, quiet voices, my birth music, aromatherapy
Pain Relief Techniques I want to use:
-Breathing techniques (breath WITH me- don’t TELL me to breath)
-Distraction (taking a walk, eating, sleeping/ resting)
-Relaxation (massage and touch (everywhere except my legs), slow breathing, guided visualization, visual imagery (waves, candle)
-Vocal- singing, moaning
-Aromatherapy
-Temp.- hot shower, birth tub, rice packs, maybe ice?
-Movement- walking, constantly changing positions, standing, rocking, hugging someone and rocking, slow dancing, pelvic tilts/ rocks, rhythmical movements (dancing?), birth ball use
-TOUCH- (light and hard and all these types)
Kissing (Justin, lol), acupressure, firm belly stroking, gentle touch, massage (both light and heavy), stroking, pressure
Ultimately, I want…
-to be able to move as I need to
-to feel uninhibited in the noises I make
-for my door to always be closed
First Stage:- Probably accomplished with most of you not here yet. Justin and I plan to go for sushi in this stage, and to get out and walk a lot (maybe mall). I don’t want to feel like a watched pot. I may want to be completely alone as well. Probably won’t need many, if any, comfort techniques.
Second Stage: Will work through comfort techniques as I need them. Need help staying hydrated (and keeping glucose levels up with light food and/or honey). Will probably want someone with me at all times. NO distractions (cell phones- even vibrate bothers me). Positions for this: squatting, hands and knees, on toilet, standing
Transition: more of above. I like Justin telling me when the contraction is half over, so if you can, wear a watch with a second hand!
Delivery: I plan on Justin and I being in the birth pool for delivery. I want to touch Kyra’s head as she crowns. Justin will catch, or I will. Kyra will immediately be skin-to-skin with me (still quiet and dark in room). Eventually, (10-15 minutes usually) placenta will be delivered. It will be saved for encapsulation the next day, so placed in Tupperware in the ‘fridge. After cord stops pulsing Justin will cut it.
After delivery: Cori (our midwife) will eventually check out Kyra (I think after Kyra is o.k. on my chest she helps us into bed, and Justin and Kyra and I have an hour completely alone to bond and rest). Then Kyra gets weighed (no shots or anything) and checked over. I’ll need to eat something healthy and light and rest.
IF I NEED TRANSPORT:
I would like you to accompany me, should the need arise and you feel comfortable. I will be including a cesarean birth plan just in case, to give the doctor.
Stephanie will be taking pictures of the birth. I’m sure that everyone else will want to spell off for rest, food and such.
I do NOT want to be told to “relax” or “breathe”. I LIKE the words:
Limp, loose, light, cool, floating, soft, calm, free, comfy, cozy, harmony, balance
I’ll be printing out some guided visualization for someone to read to me.
Our Core Parenting Values:
To raise happy and healthy children by making the best choices we can with the current information we’ve found based on research. To develop lasting, positive relationships in our family. To encourage an environment of positive action and choices based on continual learning.
Specific Actions:
-Birth- As naturally as possible. Reducing medication exposure as well as improving familial bonding and connection and experiencing a positive birth experience.
-Breastfeeding- EXCLUSIVELY! We will breastfeed exclusively until solid foods are introduced around 6 months. This will include breastfeeding on cues and demand (not on a schedule, but when baby is hungry). NO FORMULA is to be given at ANY time!! In the event Jennifer cannot breastfeed (i.e.- death) a milkbank will be used. We will also breastfeed until the CHILD is ready to wean- which is usually between 3-4 years.
-Cloth Diapering- To reduce chemical exposure and skin irritations cloth diapers will be used along with cloth wipes. The new systems are easy (and cute) and have a huge impact on budget as well as the environment.
-No/ Limited Vaccinations- At this time we have decided NOT to vaccinate. We may initiate a delayed schedule with certain (limited) vaccines in the future. This includes newborn eyedrops, vit.k and antibiotics.
-Babywearing/ Co-sleeping- We will be practicing several methods of babywearing including the sling and babycarriers. This will be done while out of the house but also at home, so our babies can remain close to us for bonding and intellectual development (among other benefits). To help in this bonding, reduce SIDS and assist with breastfeeding we will also be co-sleeping with our babies sleeping in bed with us or in a bed pushed next to us.
-We want to promote gender-neutral identities in our children. To that end we are o.k. with and encouraging play that specifically mixes gender- i.e.- our girl(s) playing with trucks, cars, etc., and our boy(s) playing house, dress-up, etc. This also applies to colors of clothing. In addition, we want to reduce the “princess” ideology for girls, and the “non-emotional” ideology for boys.
-We don’t believe corporal punishment encourages positive, future relationships or teaches lessons other than fear, lack of trust and avoidance. And if this should change, NO ONE will be allowed to administer corporal punishment to our children except Jennifer and Justin.
-Praise- Praise of effort will be what we strive for in raising our children, as this gives them a controllable action to change. In addition, we want to limit praise based on emotion without controllable qualities. For example- We will praise: effort and hard work in cleaning rooms, dressing nicely, working on a paper or subject, etc. We will LIMIT praise such as “You’re so smart, you’re so pretty” which are NOT effort-based but inherent qualities.
-We believe that if a child is old enough to ask certain questions, then they should get an (age-appropriate) answer. So if a child asks why the sky is blue, or WHY certain things happen then they should get an answer they can understand.
-Healthy Food- Healthy food contributes to healthy brain and motor development. We will limit junk foods in our house, provide healthy snacks (focusing on protein, fruits, veggies, nuts and cheeses among others) and have NO fast food or soda in our house or while out.
-We believe vocabulary is a powerful and educational part of learning. We will not limit our children’s use of vocabulary (i.e.- “cuss” words) although we will explain appropriate use of “adult” words and when they can be used (at home).
-We believe that children are very impressionable, especially in the formative first 10 years. To that extent we will be introducing them to the non-mystical belief system that we adhere to and we will severely limit their exposure to anyone discussing or practicing religion around them. (ex- not being exposed to dinner prayers, “god bless’s”, and other mystical practices within reason).
Saturday, January 22, 2011
As requested- pictures (maternity)
These are some of the maternity pictures that our wonderful (and talented) friend Joanna took! We loved taking them (right before xmas) and it was FREEZING outside, but with all my extra blood I was warm for the most part, haha.
Also, I've had one person tell me they tried to post a comment but it wouldn't let them. I'll check my settings, but let me know if the same happens for you!
Friday, January 21, 2011
End of an Era
So omg- I'm sitting here... AFTER ordering diapers (when I thought the craziness would be over) and now I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to ORGANIZE my stash that's on the way. I'm watching this video when it hits me.... NO ONE CARES ABOUT THIS STUFF BUT MOMS. I mean, 5 years ago if I'd had a friend that wanted to explain wool soakers to me I would have politely listened while thinking we had nothing in common and she was crazy. Now I'm turning into that crazy person (I think they're called a MOM) who can talk for hours about cloth diapers.... literally... not to mention, breastmilk, clothes, strollers, and all things babies. And while I know that's why they say that when you become a parent your entire circle of friends' changes, it's also very scary. All I can think it that what does that woman's husband think when he walks in the door every evening after work? His wife is stressed, (imagining me here), lucky to be dressed in clothes other than pajamas, with a day full of housework and kids... food, laundry... apparently organizing lots of cloth diapers... and I have flashbacks to when MY dad would come home and Aubrey and I were running around screaming and playing, toys everywhere, Stephanie crying, mom cooking and doing laundry....
And then I picture Justin coming home to that. What happened to the sexy clothes... glass of wine waiting, movie-watching, "normal" wife he used to have? And mixed in with that all is a healthy dose of fear... that THAT'S the real reason men leave... to go back to that "normal" place. Holy crap I think it's time for a glass of wine myself. Hah. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UigrHfTXQGg
And then I picture Justin coming home to that. What happened to the sexy clothes... glass of wine waiting, movie-watching, "normal" wife he used to have? And mixed in with that all is a healthy dose of fear... that THAT'S the real reason men leave... to go back to that "normal" place. Holy crap I think it's time for a glass of wine myself. Hah. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UigrHfTXQGg
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Moving Right Along
So, maybe I should get more involved in this... seeing as how I'm much more housebound than I originally was, and from what I hear, that will get worse, haha. I hear a LOT of things will get worse... my discomfort, my big belly, my lack of sleep... it's beginning to irritate me. I think, just to go with my contrary self, I'll start telling people how much BETTER my belly feels stretched like this, and how much I LOVE still being awake at 6 am to wake up my husband for work, and how my lack of ability to get comfortable just means I get more exercise, haha. Last night I was dreaming that justin was squeezing my belly, just like he does when he's trying to find the head/ butt of Kyra... and I woke up with her turned sideways in my UPPER abdomen with something (the head?) poking out of my side, literally, and touching my ribs. It was slightly uncomfortable and wonderful!!! We played pattycake for a while. Maybe I'll be able to sleep through early contractions after all, haha. Have a TON to do today, and it's rainy (my favorite type of day) and I SO wish I could stay here. I desperately need a new camera to actually take pictures of me, my belly, and our life in general. Sigh. It's bottom of the list. Cloth diapers come first.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Fun in the Sun
Yesterday Jen, Steph, AJ and I went to a water park. It was a great day weather-wise. Not to hot and just enough cloud cover to make standing in line bearable. Jen and I had never been to a water park together. AJ had called me up and asked if Jen and I wanted to go to Six Flags or Hurricane Harbor. I know, like some of you, how much Jen hates rollercoasters, so I chose the water park. In my mind water rides are nothing like rollercoasters. In Jen's mind there are pretty damn close.
So we set out late afternoon all lathered in sunscreen to our very first ride. The higher and higher we climbed, the less and less Jen spoke. Until I heard her mumbling to herself, "Why am I here? I hate this. I'm going on this and that's it." I then proceeded to rub her shoulders like I do when she is feeling a bit tense. It was then I noticed that Jen was starting to cry. I told her it would be okay, as we sat into our two-seater tube.
She was behind me so I could not see her face. But accounts from Stephanie say that as soon as we started down. Jen reached out for the sides to slow us down. As soon as we were engulfed in the darkness of the "Black Hole", name of ride, Jen began the loudest, gut-wrenching scream I have ever heard. Steph reports that everyong at the top of the ride turned to look down the hole from which it came from, with startled looks on their faces. After the loooong scream, Jen apparently held her breath. This was followed by a large gasp for air that sounded as if she was hyper-ventilating. I turned around to tell her it was okay. She then yelled "I'm okay, this is actualy fun." Just before the second drop. Which propelled her into another blood curdling scream.
When we got down Jen was shaking uncontolably from the adrenilin rush she gave herself. :P She did not make it on the next ride with us. She had to take a break. The good thing was that we had gone on the "scariest" ride in the park, so everything from there was a breeze. We all ended up having a blast, and minus my hearing loss from the first ride it was another fun adventure.
So we set out late afternoon all lathered in sunscreen to our very first ride. The higher and higher we climbed, the less and less Jen spoke. Until I heard her mumbling to herself, "Why am I here? I hate this. I'm going on this and that's it." I then proceeded to rub her shoulders like I do when she is feeling a bit tense. It was then I noticed that Jen was starting to cry. I told her it would be okay, as we sat into our two-seater tube.
She was behind me so I could not see her face. But accounts from Stephanie say that as soon as we started down. Jen reached out for the sides to slow us down. As soon as we were engulfed in the darkness of the "Black Hole", name of ride, Jen began the loudest, gut-wrenching scream I have ever heard. Steph reports that everyong at the top of the ride turned to look down the hole from which it came from, with startled looks on their faces. After the loooong scream, Jen apparently held her breath. This was followed by a large gasp for air that sounded as if she was hyper-ventilating. I turned around to tell her it was okay. She then yelled "I'm okay, this is actualy fun." Just before the second drop. Which propelled her into another blood curdling scream.
When we got down Jen was shaking uncontolably from the adrenilin rush she gave herself. :P She did not make it on the next ride with us. She had to take a break. The good thing was that we had gone on the "scariest" ride in the park, so everything from there was a breeze. We all ended up having a blast, and minus my hearing loss from the first ride it was another fun adventure.
Friday, July 23, 2010
As directed...
So Justin and I are starting our first blog! My mom kept talking about all the things we should be letting people know as we travel down the adventurous road of our first pregnancy together, with the end result being a journal of the next 9 (7 left, really) months of pregnancy for our child to re-read! As we haven't done a blog before we are learning many new things- like html and templates... grrrr!
So, today I am officially 8 weeks pregnant! And we were starving, so we went out for Thai food- YUM!!!! I MUST learn how to make that sweet mango rice! Ok, so now I'm hungry again, so I'm going to go find a snack, and then maybe a movie tonight- also tired, haha!
And at Summer's (quite expert) direction, I will work on acquiring lots of pictures to post!
Love to everyone!
Jennifer (aka- Dragontongue) and Justin (aka- (he forgot his dragon nickname and is playing warcraft, so currently it is "he-who-is-not-to-be-disturbed-during-this-dungeon)...lol).
So, today I am officially 8 weeks pregnant! And we were starving, so we went out for Thai food- YUM!!!! I MUST learn how to make that sweet mango rice! Ok, so now I'm hungry again, so I'm going to go find a snack, and then maybe a movie tonight- also tired, haha!
And at Summer's (quite expert) direction, I will work on acquiring lots of pictures to post!
Love to everyone!
Jennifer (aka- Dragontongue) and Justin (aka- (he forgot his dragon nickname and is playing warcraft, so currently it is "he-who-is-not-to-be-disturbed-during-this-dungeon)...lol).
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